news article

National gathering addresses sexual ethics

October 23, 2015 / By Jenn Meadows

"The mission of the church is affected by the health of the church," said Bishop Debra Wallace-Padgett of the North Alabama Conference. "A church that is healthy has healthy boundaries."

Exploring healthy boundaries were more than 200 bishops, conference leaders, pastors, and others attending Do No Harm, a sexual ethics summit in Chicago on Oct. 15-17. Included in the gathering were four individuals from the Upper New York Conference: The Rev. Bob Kolvik-Campbell, pastor at the Christ United Methodist Church in Sherrill; the Rev. Dr. Cathy Hall Stengel, pastor at the Rush UMC; and lay members Carol Barnes and Glenda Schuessler.

“Do No Harm is proactive in many ways,” Bishop Wallace-Padgett said, “as we think about how to prevent boundary crossing [and how to] be better at responding to when boundaries are crossed.”

In being able to respond when a boundary is crossed in Upper New York, Rev. Stengel said the Conference’s Crisis Response Team has a solid start.

“We gathered from across the denomination to talk about one of our most painful truths: the reality of sexual misconduct in our churches and communities. The collaboration of wisdom, experience, and shared resources was a gift,” she said. “I learned that the Upper New York Crisis Response Team has started well, and with our collective learning/experience in Chicago, we are and will continue to be an asset.”

Rev. Kolvik-Campbell attended the summit, representing the Board of Ordained Ministry; he has also been working on the Clergy Boundaries Awareness Training. The workshops he attended – Multiplicity and Ministry: Living Your Call without Losing Yourself, Culture Matters: Navigating Culture Differences that Make a Difference, and Relationships, Social Media and the Church, to name a few – “offered excellent hands-on practical information to assist our work on the Board of Ordained Ministry and for our United Methodist Sexual Ethics Team.”

“The plenary sessions called us to examine our attitudes and practices concerning accountability,” he said. “Some of what we heard was hard to hear, and yet in the spirit of the event, we know that encouraging and practicing good boundaries is what we are called to do.”

The gathering was also an opportunity to establish or strengthen cross-connection connections.

“This bright Chicago weekend allowed me to connect with others in conferences across the connection, including Russia, to hear how each handles Boundaries Awareness Training and to work closely with the rest of our Upper New York Conference Team in attendance,” Rev. Kolvik-Campbell said.

Carol Barnes, Upper New York’s Sexual Ethics Committee Convener for the Safe Sanctuaries Team, also appreciated connecting with others.

“I enjoyed meeting new people with similar responsibilities and learning about the steps that need to be taken in holding individuals accountable for their actions as well as the work of response teams. I attended several sessions that focused on Safe Sanctuaries and noted that Upper New York is in line with most of the recommended best practices,” she said. “A highlight for me was meeting Joy Melton, author of the Safe Sanctuaries books that are widely used not just in The United Methodist Church but by other denominations as well."

This, the third sexual ethics summit, was hosted by the United Methodist Interagency Sexual Ethics Task Force, which is coordinated by the United Methodist Commission on the Status and Role of Women. Thanks to a grant from the Connectional Table, central conference representatives from Mozambique, South Africa, Russia, and the Philippines also participated.

Offering Response Team and Safe Sanctuary training and 18 workshops, the conference addressed recent developments and challenges in preventing and responding to abuse, misconduct, and sexual harassment, particularly by persons in ministerial roles, both lay and clergy, within The United Methodist Church.

“Do No Harm helps us talk about something we have been reluctant to talk about,” said Bishop Mary Virginia Taylor of the Holston Conference. “The church needs to be a safe place for everybody.”

With every mountaintop, said Bishop Sally Dyck of the Northern Illinois Conference, there is a valley, and Jesus calls us to be in those valleys. Concerning sexual misconduct, she said, “It is power that corrupts. When we forget we are to be the children of God, we go off track.”

"Our bodies matter"

The Rev. Verlee Copeland led the plenary session “A Message of Hope: Embracing Wholeness of Our Faith and Sexuality.” “We act as if we have the liberty to separate body from spirit, doing whatever we want without consequences,” she said. “Our bodies matter. Our bodies have purpose and worth. Our bodies need to be care for and cherished.” Copeland is senior minister of First Parish United Church of Christ in York, Maine.

Bill Waddell, legal adviser to the Council of Bishops, led attendees through the process handling sexual misconduct as mandated in The Book of Discipline. He reminded the group that some elements of the process are required, while others are left up to interpretation. However, Waddell said, “We need to do better by doing more than what is just required.

“The Do No Harm conference renews us and gives us hope that the church is living into its commitment to be the nurturing community for all,” he said. “It is important to raise our consciousness, to learn best practices, and to leverage our ability to address issues across the connection.”

Do No Harm 2015 ended with a performance by SCREAM (Students Challenging Realities and Educating Against Myths) Theatre of Rutgers University and closing worship led by West Ohio Bishop Gregory Vaughn Palmer and the Rev. Cynthia Wilson, Assistant Vice President of Student Life and Dean of Students at Garrett Evangelical Theological Seminary. Palmer noted, “With experience, we sadly discover we are the priest and the Levite crossing on the other side of the road” when dealing with sexual misconduct in our congregations. “There’s a gap between our aspiration and our incarnation. This is the time to close the gap between the two.”

The United Methodist Interagency Sexual Ethics Task Force began in the mid-1990s. IASETF includes representatives from several United Methodist general agencies, United Methodist Women, annual conferences, and the Council of Bishops. The Commission on the Status and Role of Women convenes the task force.

Jenn Meadows is Director of Communications at the General Commission on the Status and Role of Women (GCSRW). She is a certified deacon candidate in the Indiana Annual Conference and is currently pursuing a Masters of Divinity at Garrett-Evangelical Theological Seminary.